Studio Notes 037
the summer solstice, esoteric neuroplasticity, and hot divorcée summer
LATELY
The Summer solstice is upon us and Cancer season is IMMINENT.
The energy is SOMETHING right now with mercury slowing down in my sign of Cancer and the last day chiron in Aries closing out old wound cycles. It’s not even technically mercury retrograde yet and I have had no fewer than four exes and even a former employer pop out of the woodwork to “check in”. It’s been an amusing few days.
In addition to what the heavens have had up their sleeve, this week also marked a big personal milestone: the two year anniversary of separating from my husband. For such a life-changing moment, I didn’t even clock what day it was until the mid-afternoon, which in and of itself felt like huge, tangible growth, as last year I anxiously counted down for days.
I have felt so OVERCOME with gratitude in the days since, I’ve felt like I could burst. I don’t wish the trauma of divorce on my worst enemy, but HOLY SHIT my dude, you better believe I’d do it over ten times if it meant I get to live the life I’m living now!
There’s not one element of my old life that remains. From the art on my walls to the people in my phone favorites to the clothes in my closet to the way I carry myself to the tattoos on my skin, every cell of me has turned over. Even my face is different. I know I’ve written about this quite a bit, but the sheer enormity of the gift of getting a second chance at life still punches me in the gut. I hope I never lose sight of just how lucky I am. As you know by now from my previous essays, the most life-changing element of the whole experience was not, in fact, frantically figuring out the whole how to be financially independent thing, but…that it got me dancing again.
Two years ago I hadn’t set foot in a dance studio in over five years. For someone who started dancing at age three and had rarely gone more than five days without dancing before that, it’s quite obvious through the clear goggles of hindsight that I lost myself there. It’s foreboding absence in my life affected my confidence, my autonomy, my mental health, and the light in my eyes. Even when I was dancing professionally, though, I couldn’t imagine sharing footage of me dancing on the internet. Flash forward two years later, I’m dancing 4-5x a week and post a clip from my favorite heels teacher Tomoko Ishikawa’s class and it gets over 100k views. Instagram means nothing at the end of the day and I care more about the fact that I:
felt confident enough to post a unrehearsed clip in the first place
can see and feel how much ankle stability and self-trust (have you ever whipped your hair aggressively in a stiletto on one leg??) I’ve developed in the last eight-sh months of taking heels regularly
have a visual documentation of feeling embodied and sexy and ME again (June 2024 Helen was not doing much but stare vacantly out the window listening to Fiona Apple)
…than I do about the fact that it reached so many people. However, the external validation from 708 shares, 1.6k saves, and nearly 8k likes, and the positive comments from fellow dancers was, admittedly, a reallllllly nice way to commemorate just how gorgeous life gets when you get back to the things you love and get rid of the people who can’t love you.
Hoping the universe hits you with some reminders to be grateful this holiday weekend, too!
If you’re looking for a way to celebrate the solstice, I hope you’ll join me on Zoom for the Somatic Solstice Ritual Sunday, June 21st at 10am ET with Eden Sky Orion-equal parts mat pilates, meditation, journaling, and astrology reading for the summer season. Class is totally free and there will be a replay, but you have to sign up to access.
ICYMI: I’m also teaching a free outdoor class in Williamsburg this Saturday 10am June 20th and June 27th as part of the Domino Park Summer Summer Series. BYO mat and meet at the Flex Field!
Well Hell is a reader supported publication. HPS Studio Notes are always free, but to read the rest of HPS Well Hell’s columns, receive product round-ups, technique guides, and access to Zoom classes, upgrade to the paid subscription.
SENSORY EDIT
“To The Woman Who Is Finally Reaching The End Of Grief” — Her Feminine Manifesto
“I Thought I Knew Everything About Heartbreak” — The Diary Of A Lover Girl
Sommer Swim Nero Bikini Top and Bottom
“How To Make June Solstice Magic” - Chani
“The Other Marriage: Female Friendship As The Great Love Story Of A Woman’s Life” — Mouthful of Marigolds
“10 Reasons Why (Human) Creativity Will Save The Day” — The Hyphen
“Many Mother Tongues, Language After Trauma & Matrescence” — Motherlingual
“The Person In Love Never Loses” — It’s All That Deep To Me
“Hot Women Eat” — Wyld Women Wellness
Aritzia Medallion Athletic Short (I’m wearing a small in the cover photo)
“An Esoteric Guide To Neuroplasticity (Spiraling Upward) — Unravelling
“Should Men Be Allowed to Read?” — Notes In My Handbag
* May contain affiliate links
WHAT I WORE TEACHING PILATES THIS WEEK
YOUR ON-DEMAND SCHEDJ THIS WEEK
We’re still in the Summer Solstice Slow Burn Challenge which will culminate on June 21st at 10am ET on Zoom in a free pilates, journaling, and astrology workshop: The Summer Solstice Ritual with Eden Sky Orion!
Non-members can drop-in to Zoom anytime for $25/class. HPS is $44/month (with sliding scale pricing available for those in need) and you get access to 500+ on-demand workouts, monthly programs, challenges, and live Zoom every week.
QUICK LINKS
Abs, Asana, Affirmations: The Catskills Retreat July 23rd-26th, 2026
Join Lulu Soni and me for a somatic summer camp— we have only 3 king bedrooms remaining!
The HPS x Beth Cooke Flow Tuscany Pilates & Yoga Retreat August 20th-25th, 2026
Pilates, yoga, meditation, and journaling with Helen Phelan and Beth Cooke HPS Friday live noon Zooms (12pm ET, free for HPS members, $25 drop in, paid Substack subscribers get one free Zoom a month, too!)
xx,
Helen
If you’re new to my Substack, hi!
My whole schtick is intuitive movement is a springboard for creativity, a necessity for mental health, and the most effective way I know to practice embodiment and mindfulness. The Well Hell Substack is a place for me to word vomit all my thoughts on well-being, body image, psychology, creativity, diet culture, and movement as medicine based on my 13 years of experience teaching boutique fitness in NYC. I rant about things I hate about the wellness industry, share products I’m loving, articles/books that made me think, and anything else I just want to wax poetically into the void about.
I love getting your email replies, but if you leave your note in the comments instead, it helps more people see Well Hell! Obligatory, shameless request for you to like, share, and engage with these posts after you read them—it’s free, takes zero seconds, and helps the publication get way better reach. Save it, send to a friend, restack it. You get it. LOVE YOU.
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